Trust
by loversrebellion
Summary: Spencer tells Hanna about her and Emily's history. How they progressed through their problems. Oneshot Spemily.


Trust

"When he wasn't there she slid into his place, carefully. I never let my guard down because that's just not what I do. But this time was, so...different. I didn't understand a damn thing going inside of my head. Or my heart. When his arms weren't wrapped around me, keeping me safe, just like he promised. It was her I slowly allow it to happen. I admit, I was resistant at first, I pushed her away every chance I got. Because I thought he was the only one that I wanted, that I loved. I thought he would come back for me, I thought he would save me. I fell for him and all his whispers that he confided in my ears.

Also all the times that he left, somehow hope still bloomed in me, slowly.

Everything about him, is so...slow. But she was fast to come in with all the strength she has, which was a little too much for me to handle at first. One day I finally decided to take her hand and let her lead me somewhere better. She accomplished it with ease, but he still haunts. Toby is still in my heart, but Emily still tends to replace. Tends to wash away the filth he left behind. I have allowed myself to believe she actually cares. She keeps her promises. She keeps all the love she has for me in that heart of hers. Who am I not to trust my best friend. I should have known from the beginning that Emily would never harm anything or anyone. Even if they caused harm to her. I don't ever think about hurting her, not even if I had to.

'I will take this away if you will just let me, Spence. You won't have to fight anymore. I will do all the fighting for you. Just let me love you.'

She told me the night I gave up to her. The night I cried into her chest, let her smooth, comforting hands, rub in patterns on my back. Let her lay her lips across my cheek. I fell into her, and she caught me and carried me away. Carried me away from what she promised she would, the never ending fight I had with myself and Toby. Her arms fit so perfectly around me. This might just sound like a memory. But she is still here with me, she still has me and I still have her.

I will tell you about the day I actually let her completely into my heart. Emily has always had a way with words.

'Spence, I love you.' She said it loud and clear, looking at me, seriously.

'Ems...I love you too."

'But do you love me the way I love you?"

'I honestly don't know. I have never thought about it.'

'You don't think about it you feel it. Have you felt it?'

'I...don't..."

'Have you felt it when I kiss you, when I hold you?'

'Yes I felt something but I don't know what it is.'

'Was it like it was with Toby.'

'It, was...better. So much better.' She smiled at that, I know I could never forget that smile once I saw it.

'Describe it to me I always like a story.' Emily was talented enough to through good humor into a tight situation and still is.

'When you hold me, I feel, invincible.' Clichéd? Yeah I thought so too.

'I just feel safe, you are completely different from Toby. I think that's what I enjoy the most. You keep your promises, you don't leave me in my time of need.'

'What about when I kiss you?'

'They are comforting and don't bother me one bit. They actually have the power to make me feel even closer to you. A feeling that I don't ever want to let go. That I just want to freeze time and stay in that moment forever. Sometimes I even want you to...'

'To what?'

'Kiss me on my...lips. Well most of the time I do.'

Without a word she grabbed each side of my face and kissed me. She was so soft, her touch, her lips, her body pressed into mine. I pressed back, surprisingly I was the one that added more passion. I wrapped my arms around the back of her neck, and forced her closer into me. It just seemed like space shouldn't have exist. That the closer we got, just wasn't close enough.

We made love that night and not because I felt like I needed to. It was because I was ready to and I wanted it. I wanted the closeness that I just begged for. I just knew the moment we kissed that I wanted her more than anything. And now that same girl is at our house, taking care of our son, Joseph, your nephew."

"Well damn Spence, that's not even all of it is it?"

"No Hanna you should be lucky I left a huge chunk out."

"Ha yeah well don't worry I am."

"Now tell me the one about you and Maya."

"Ha don't even get me started."


End file.
